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‘Cha-ching!’ I thought as I logged into the Lotto app… turns out I’d just got four out of six numbers. My imagination started running wild, as I started spending my millions before I’d even banked it. I’d never been to Monte Carlo, or test driven a Lambo. How much were yachts these days? The champers in my head was already popping!

Put that bottle on ice…

My luxury lifestyle limped to a halt, as I learnt my prize was a few zeros shorter than first anticipated… still £140 wasn’t the worst news! My mum beamed with excitement as I let her know about my windfall. With two weeks off from work, the stars were seemingly aligning: “You should go away love… I’ll kitty-sit!” I’d literally been scribbling down a 2026 bucket list a few days before, with ‘visit Ireland or Scotland’ at the top.

Both countries had evaded me until now, so it was time to put one of these right! As I weighed up the options, I cracked open a Guiness and stuck Father Ted on the box…

Dublin my money

SCREEEEACHHHH went the tyres, causing us to bounce in our seats. After no more than hour in flight, we’d just landed in Ireland! 45 calendar years in the making, our weekend in Dublin was about to commence!

With the wife in tow, our check-out was rapid, as we flashed security our passports and whizzed through customs; it was barely 10mins before we’d quickly joined a popular bus queue with no real time to check its destination! God was on our side as we followed the signs to Dublin (and not Belfast) on the motorway!

Temple-tations

With our hotel checked in and bags dropped, we were just two of the estimated 8.6m visitors that year. We were staying in the Temple Bar area, sharing its name with the city’s most recognised pub. As a seasoned Guiness drinker, I’d heard tales of it tasting much better in Ireland, so to say I was looking forward to that first pint was an understatement!

The tastebuds were turning. With every other building a pub, it was hard not to go 5 seconds without seeing the famous Guiness harp logo… this was not helping!

With our bellies rumbling, we decided to kick off our visit with a sit-down meal. ‘Irish Stew?’ Nah. We got fully cultural, diving into a traditional Chinese… that wasn’t serving Guiness. Literally the only place in Dublin that didn’t!

When we did finally get to a pub, that long-awaited first pint awaited. I took a big old gulp of the black stuff! It tasted good! Ice cold with my mind convincing me it did taste a bit different? Or did it? I wasn’t sure? Might need to try another somewhere to compare…

Your place of worship

Fast forward about 5 hours and my eyes were getting glassier, and we were now in a comedy club called The Craic Den checking out some local talent! Numerous pints in and still not 100% the Guiness tasted different, so the experiment had to continue… strolling around streets we found what certainly felt like the busiest pub flooded with people in and out: this was the Temple Bar!

As the doors slung open, the place was absolutely rammed; a melting pot of different nationalities and slurring accents! Manouvering to the bar was like a human game of Tetris, as a couple of musicians provided the soundtrack as they fiddled their fiddles!

When we did finally get to the bar, this black felt whack, costing me short of ten quid… if it didn’t taste different before, it definitely did now…! As the streets danced and sung, we meandered back to the hotel to call it a night: day one complete!

Day two be sure

With an obligatory visit to the Guiness factory denied (note to self, don’t leave it to the morning to book), our plan b saw us heading to a little café called First Chapter. The place was like being in A-ha’s Take on Me video - everything just sketched in black and white. Little did I know that I was about to have one of the best brunches ever…

I’d opted for the Avocado on toast, basic right? Wrong! As my order arrived, so did my smile! The crispy artisan bread topped with a poached egg, creamy avocado mash and seasoned with Sicilian lemon, sea salt, finished with arugula, Parmigiano and crispy chill to give it a kick! Every mouthful better than the last. I was gutted when there was none left, but thanked the Chef; leaving a few euros in his tip jar. What a start to the day!

Our legs lead the way; exploring charity shops, admiring street art, crate digging and trainer shopping. We checked out Love Lane and its thousands of messages handwritten on its brick walls, and even saw the Dublin Portal, as we waved to those on the other side of the world (NYC I believe).

Nicey spicey

Another evening of stand-up awaited, so we decided to line our stomachs before at ‘Doom Slice’. Hidden down a little street we’d spotted earlier that day, one particular thing on their sign catching our attention: spice bags!

Now if you’ve no idea what one of those is, neither did we…but they did come recommended! Think a bag full or fast-food fierceness: crispy chips, fried chicken, peppers, onions and a load of spices – all shook up, resulting in a flavour fiesta in your mouth! This place had a spice bag inspired pizza. “Two mega slices please!”

With not much of our weekend break left, it was a Brucie bonus when we worked out Doom Slice was sitting on the back of The Pawn Shop: a massive, really cool bar with Ghettoblasters, taxidermy and quirkly looking characters in every corner… this was a bit of us! The slices arrived and lived up to the hype.

As we left the venue a few hours later, our cogs were well and truly Maragarita oiled; making for another hilarious night, as we walked over the rainbow bridge to In Stitches Comedy, before boomeranging back to The Pawn Shop for their late night DJ session, this time the eats were replaced with beats, as Sara Miller supplied our final night soundtrack as we danced into the evening…

Thank you Dublin, we’re already looking forward to the sequel!